Please, I need help in picking a tractor

Hello to all my Tractor Forum buddies ,
I have purchased my fair share of wrong tractors and have almost killed myself driving them. If I don't die while using the tractor, my wife will kill me anyway.
Please help me with some suggestions. I have 28 acres on the side of a mountain in upper New York State and there is very little level ground (17% grade in spots). I have about a 1,500 feet of driveway composed of #2 and #3 stone overlayed with millings. I do a lot of fixing of that driveway, ditching, moving trees and occasionally trying to haul a 3,000 pound loaded trailer up the driveway.
I first purchased a John Deere (I think it was a 5540N at auction. I didn't know what I was buying, but it looked pretty with low hours and great price. I didn't know the N stood for Narrow. I found out that I could kill myself with it being so unstable on hillsides, so I got rid of that and made a few bucks. I then read that a Zetor was a real workhorse and a bargain for all the tractor power for the money. It is nice and wide, very stable, a powerhouse rated at 65 HP, but handles like it has 100 HP. Being that it is a manual shift (I believe 8 forward and 8 back). I have really almost killed myself on this one since it has brakes that totally suck. If I am pushing stone on my driveway and I stall out or need to back up on a steep slope, this tractor loves to roll. When I say roll I mean I almost have to stand on the brakes with all my might to get it shifted or started. I almost lost it trying to go up a hill with lumber on my 16' trailer. The tractor stalled and started picking up speed backwards. I went about 100' before stopping and was ready to try and jump off. Its a very reliable tractor and starts every time, but it is good only for level ground or semi level farming.
I think I need a used tractor with a bucket that can lift 2,000-2,500 pounds, Maybe from 30 to 50 HP?, Hydrostatic Transmission and possibly a cab with A/C and Heat. A backhoe would be a plus, but not if it would be difficult to change from a backhoe to a brush hog, Post hole digger, Log splitter or other three point implement. Having extra remotes would be nice. I do like Kubota and John Deere, but I have looked at Kioti, Mahindra and a few others.
I do have a small excavator, but it would be nice to have a back hoe on the tractor if I should need it. I don't needier want to buy new, 5 to 15 years old with reasonable hours and in good shape is what I expect.
Please help me with your wisdom and OZ powers to steer me in the right direction. Please let me know your best recommendations and what I should look at paying. I do not use a tractor very much. I maybe use it 20-30 hours a year so paying a lot for something that sits for weeks or months at a time is not good for the budget. If you can, Please copy your suggestions to my Email ar [email protected] since I may not always get to see them on this forum or know when my question has been answered. .
Thank You, Richard